Something about counting eggs in a basket.

I never know what to do with all my incomplete blogs.  They hang out among the list of published blogs, begging for me to delete them.  Granted, no one's going to read them because I'm no longer on the Facebook, but they represent my unfinished thoughts about subjects.  The last one was about the weekend we lost the cat (I say we, but I wasn't present at the actual losing of the cat), and I'm torn between sharing the grief and pain I encountered that weekend and not ever posting it because she's came back on her own.
It did make me realize a lot about what was going on with me.  Especially the fact that I wasn't handling the stress of work and family very well.  My life has quickly become summed into two places where they each have their own stress, each encroach on the other, and neither are a proper escape from the other.  I mean, it's not like I can head over to my girlfriend's house and spend the night there to get away from my family.
So, yea; the cat thing made me realize I needed to take a break from work and home for a little while.  I don't really have the option to break away from my family, so the six days I had off from work did include three of them in the middle with the kids (they had Friday off and of course the weekend).  It's not a bad thing, but I really didn't do anything I personally promised myself I would do.  Like nothing.
I was worried at work that I was beginning to go into auto pilot and my not caring was beginning to show.  The break helped, but all that stress didn't actually go away; it actually got worse because I wasn't there to deal with things.  That part always sucks about work and vacation, you know, where you realize that if you didn't take vacation you wouldn't be more stressed when you came back.  The three days this week fully felt like five.
But yea, the stress kind of didn't go away and I realize I have zero motivation or even care.  Like I said in another post, my life has become my work and my kids; so is absence of anything else, I am a little defeated when I realize I do not have the rich wealth of friends to hang out with.  I mean I have a couple options, but they live far away so you'd have to plan for that, and they have their own lives so there's planning in that too.
I'm not bemoaning the fact that my life if full of friendship acquaintances and a small number of close friends.  It's just that I don't have the people-pool I had to chose from as I did in the Navy or even at my last job.  I have two co-workers that have different live styles than me and the above examples of far-a-way friends.
I woke up this morning to Moon being gone, which means she went to go spend the night at a friend's house.  Again.  Something she has as an option to get away from the loveless marriage she has deemed necessary.  I get that there's no longer going to be any physical expression between us and no desire to hang out with each other; I mean get it, but it's still hard to accept seeing as how it's not the case for me.  It's just hard to be comforted in being told the way things seem are not how they are but then also have the ability to observe and make conclusions to the contrary.  I guess I just miss having that close friend.  My life "evolved" from the pool of friends to that one close friend - who no longer wants to be my friend.

Something about counting eggs in a basket.  I get it now.